Sitting With My Power

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inner strength and power

Energy is super intense these days. Talk to older Yogi’s and Energy Workers and everyone agrees that energetic time is speeding up. Manifestation happens quickly and so does spiritual growth. It seems as soon as you decide that you’re interested in developing some sort of a spiritual practice, you shoot down the rabbit hole, there’s not much time to just sit with one toe in.

All of this can feel super intense. When you do decide to meditate, go to a Reiki session, or see an energy worker, the energy is so intense that it’s hard to explain what’s happening, if it’s normal and what to do with the messages you are getting. Does this sound familiar? I still feel overwhelmed after almost every meditation. It’s because of this that Rachel and I have decided to start holding Transformational Energy Circles the 3rd Wednesday of each month. We want a space for people to share their stories, their journey and connect to others without feeling weird or different. It’s also a place where we will have group meditations, yoga and readings in order to collectively grow, since we know that we can achieve even more when we band together.

I decided to write this blog for 2 reasons,

  1. It’s a way for me to “come out of the closet” and share some of my story without fear of being judged as a nut bar or as someone who is full of themselves.
  2. I want to share so that you are more comfortable sharing your stories with people around you. Often when something “weird” happens, or when we practice something “weird”, we feel don’t share it for years. With collective energy shifts speeding up, I’m hoping that by sharing my story, you feel more comfortable sharing yours and it leads to a ripple of people coming out of their spiritual closets.

So here it goes…

Back in 2010, alone in my apartment, I lead myself through a vinyasa sequence and then sat at the end for what I thought was going to be a brief meditation. All of a sudden, my spine started growing. I was sitting so tall that I though my body was literally stretching. There was a band of white light that felt like it started under my tush shooting all the way through the core of myself towards my head. My head started turning a little back and forth but “I” wasn’t doing it, this energetic white light was. Eventually it straightened out and I feel as though I was connected to the core of the earth and the atmosphere above me. I just sat there, frozen, like this, filled with so much intense white light energy that I barely could breathe! My physical body seemed to twinkle and I had completely lost touch with where my body was in space. 30 min later, I could move my body again but I was super nauseous. I ran to my washroom and “vomited” air for 15 min. It was as if my body was cleansing old energy that was no longer useful to me anymore. Then I just sat on my couch for about 20m thinking “what the $*#%?”. I didn’t know who to talk to about what happened so I emailed my Yoga teacher trainer and got in contact with a yogi friend here. Most of them agreed that this could be considered a “kundalini awakening”. I thought that was super cool but at the same time felt super weird for months. “What do I do with this connection that I have found?” Every yoga practice and meditation since, I get this straightening of the spine accompanied by a blinding white light that runs through me. Often as I’m meditation my arms and hands move freely without my control. I actually stopped meditating for months because it was just too intense.

In the last month, a new shift has occurred and I’m once again asking What do I do with this connection that I have found?” . While I’m driving, as I’m resting on the couch, before I fall asleep in bed and even sometimes after I’ve had a few drinks at home, my palms get hot. There is an intense amount of healing energy that just comes to them to the point that often I keep them cupped closed. Not having any formal energy work training, I usually just breathe and then ask myself where it needs to be sent. If a clear message comes to me, I will focus on that thought and then send it that way. Sometimes images will flow with the energy that I’m sending, like one night when I sent some purple and pink butterflies to my daughter. Other times, I just sit with it and ponder how I’m going to use this connection for the betterment of our universe.

I often feel as though I’m not serving enough with the powerful connections I have found to universal and healing energies. I don’t like to use the term, the power I have been given because I truly believe we all have it in us, it just presents to us at different times and in different ways when we are open to it. I hope my story shows you that the energetic experiences we have, rarely lead to a clear answer as to what to do. We just have to trust in it and attempt to keep moving forward with it. I’m still learning to trust my experiences as real. I know that, with divine timing, situations will start to present themselves that will fit the skills that I have uncovered and I will be able to serve more people with my skills. Trusting while keeping my eyes open has lead me in so many amazing directions with my degree, my certifications and my business. Some days it’s simple and some days are hard and it’s all part of the journey.

Trust In Yourself and do me a favor… tell someone your story!

Love and Light

Jayleen